by Steven Gledhill for FREEdom from MEdom Project…

Whoosh!

Why don’t we trust God? Is it because we struggle to entirely believe?

Hebrews 11:1 says, “Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen.” Faith comes from hope being realized in substance according to the evidence. We don’t see gravity but we experience gravity all the time. We know the truth about gravity and come to trust it even though we do not see it. It could be said that we have a relationship with gravity. Our lives are touched by gravity everyday.

The truth is that freedom is achieved through a revolutionary event. ‘Revolutionary’ means a sudden, radical, or complete change; a fundamental change in the way of thinking about or visualizing something; a change in paradigm (belief, world view), meaning your standard for living. A sudden revelation of faith having encountered the Savior, Jesus Christ, will speak life into how you experience revolutionary transformative recovery in how you live everyday—a new standard of thinking and living, with healthy hopeful expectations. It is in relationship with Jesus that you will come to know God to be real and living. It is in relationship with Christ that you enter into the new age of grace that will usher you into the experience of new life.

Dean, a 135 pound man in his mid-thirties, has been dependent on alcohol for the better part of twenty years. Beer was his drug of choice and until recently, he was drinking 15-20 beers alone each night in a period of 4-6 hours until about 10:30 or so at night before he would make his way to bed and crash until his alarm went off early the next morning.Each beer contains one ounce of alcohol, so Dean was consuming 15-20 ounces of alcohol each evening after he arrived home from work. The body metabolizes about one ounce of alcohol per hour. Since he may have metabolized 4-5 ounces of alcohol in the hours he was drinking, Dean had 10-15 beers in his system when he fell asleep, resulting in dangerous blood alcohol levels.

This occurred everyday for a number of years. It should be said too that Dean, having metabolized between six to eight beers from the time he passed out until the time he left for work, likely had between four and as many as eight beers still in his system when he left for work, meaning his blood alcohol level could still be as much or more than twice the legal limit as he drove into work. Dean reported to me there were times when he saw yellow in his eyes, which could have been the result of some liver damage. Eventually, he would have severe alcohol-related physical problems if he continued using alcohol while increasing his use.

Dean was a functioning alcoholic, meaning that he never missed work, got to work on time, babysat grandchildren, and so on. He knows now that his alcoholism would have escalated and that he would have an increase in severity of his problems related to alcohol use had he continued to use. Dean realized it was a matter of time before he would not be able to consume enough beer in his allotted time to drink, and he would likely drink more often during daytime hours. He also recognized the likelihood that he would not be able to consume enough beer needed to achieve the feeling he was after, and would need to include harder liquor with much heavier alcohol content, perhaps mixed with his beer to achieve desired results. Dean sure enjoyed his beer.

Dean had already lost one marriage due mostly to alcohol and drug-related problems and had been estranged from his teenage daughter for a couple of years, due in large part from his own shame and feeling like he was unworthy to be her dad. When his current wife of five years finally told him to choose between their marriage and his love for beer, Dean decided to get help. His wife contacted me at Heritage Counseling Center because we believe recovery from alcohol and drug dependence centers on a life-changing relationship with God.

A consideration for Dean coming to Heritage was that he had very little church background and had very little understanding about God. One might say that convincing Dean that Jesus was real, alive, and involved in his life, would be the equivalent of suggesting that Santa Claus was real, alive, and involved in his life—that Dean should pray to Santa and trust Santa for transformative power. Dean agreed to come to Heritage because we were in his insurance network through his Employee Assistance Program. One thing that Dean did understand was that he was spiritually bankrupt in his addiction to alcohol. Dean needed hospitalization in a detox unit to help him endure the symptoms of acute withdrawal. He was then admitted to our five-week intensive outpatient program (IOP) at Heritage.

I had the opportunity to share with Dean why Jesus Christ was the One—the only One—capable and willing to empower him to a life of recovery from an insurmountable addiction to alcohol. Dean would have to transition from disbelief to belief. He would have to agree that Jesus not only lived but suffered and died for his selfishness and weakness, and that Jesus arose from the dead. Dean would have to find the account of the empty tomb to be compelling enough that it is possible that this story of an event some two thousand years ago might just be true.

I told Dean that ancient historical manuscripts of literature confirm the life and death of Jesus. I told Dean about the historical accuracy of the movement (perceived by political and religious leaders as a rebellion) Jesus led against the oppressive religious hierarchy that was supported by the Roman government. I told Dean about the claims by Jesus to be the Son of God with claims of resurrection from the dead three days after his execution—claims uncontested by historical accounts.  I told him that historical literature documents that the tomb was heavily guarded with some two dozen trained and skilled Roman soldiers so as to not allow any room or opportunity for sabotage concerning the body of Jesus lying in the tomb. I told him that a massive stone weighing one and a half to two tons was used to seal a large hole dug into the side of a cave. I told Dean that the most ancient of historical manuscripts are in agreement that the tomb was in fact empty by the third day since the crucifixion of Jesus. I told him that there are historical accounts of Jewish witnesses of resurrected Jesus who sacrificed everything—their birthrights, marriages and families, inheritances, etc.—to do nothing more than speak the truth about there experience. Many of those eyewitnesses were executed in martyrdom for speaking the truth of what they experienced first hand.

Dean accepted that I would not deliberately deceive or misguide him, but what if I was misguided by some religious hoax? What then? How would this God or this Jesus empower him to recovery from his marriage and family killing disease that was also destined to destroy him, body, mind, and spirit?

While in his first week of treatment, Dean was on his way home from his IOP session when he was overcome by his urge to drink. He felt that on a scale of ten his compulsion to drink was at least 20. He was determined to stop at the gas station to buy his cigarettes and beer. At the same time, he became very afraid that doing so would cost him his marriage…again. This was an excruciating dilemma for Dean as he wrestled with ambivalent feelings of immense proportion and consequence. If he did not consume alcohol, he would go insane, literally; yet if he did drink, he would not be able to stop and he’d lose his wife, whom he loved dearly. Dean cried out, “Jesus, I don’t know if you’re real, but Steve sure believes you are,” as he prayed out loud to the God of Steve. Little did Dean know, but he was praying to the God of Dean.

“Jesus, let me do the impossible”

Dean said to Jesus, “If you’re real, come into my life and take away my need to drink.” Then suddenly, something happened to him. He said it was like a “whoosh” hit him that he could not explain. He said he felt different in some way. It was like letting air out of the balloon of his enormous urge to drink. Dean knew right then and there that the same Jesus that arose from the dead changed his mind as he cried out to him. Jesus Christ empowered Dean to do what was not possible in his own ability.

Pastor Fran Leeman (LifeSpring Community Church, Plainfield, IL)  preached a sermon about Peter walking on water. Peter and the disciples were sailing in the midst of a terrible storm when he saw Jesus, apparently standing out on the water. How was this possible? How could a man stand on the water? Peter shouted out, “Jesus, if it’s really you, tell me to come to you, walking on the water.” “Yes come,” Jesus said (Matthew 14:28-29, NLT). Pastor Leeman pointed out that he would have yelled out in a panic, “Jesus, if it’s you, calm the storm!” He said he would have wanted to see the evidence that it was Jesus, but that Peter took a much different approach. Rather than ask Jesus to prove himself real by doing the impossible, Peter asked Jesus to empower him, Peter, to do the impossible by the authority and power given him by Jesus. What profound truth.

My client Dean did this. He didn’t have anymore faith than to ask Jesus, “Is it really you?” “Are you real?” “Will you help me?” Jesus answered, “Yes, come.” Then Jesus, who spoke creation into existence with complete authority, blessed Dean with the power and the authority to do the impossible by the power given him. Dean did not have faith, really. What did he know? What Dean had was hope that Jesus was real and that he’d show up. When we know that we have no other choice but to trust God for the impossible, even when our faith is lacking and unsure, when we need a miracle, he will grant us the power to do the impossible; to move a mountain. Dean moved a mountain that night. Praise God!

Dean was giddy with assurance as he recounted the story of his miraculous drive home from treatment the night before. He reported having a genuine sense of enthusiasm and anticipation for his treatment and a life free of alcohol. For Dean, that was already a departure from his “normal” way of thinking. In an instant, Jesus Christ changed Dean’s mind. Dean had no doubt that Jesus is real. His attitude about sobriety was completely changed.

Dean learned to make sense of the ABCs of recovery from a life filled with alcohol and drug addiction with all of its disappointment and conflict. Dean would tell you himself that as he admitted to God that he was not in control of his life and powerless to do anything about it except pray for help to do the impossible, that God was faithful. He confessed to Jesus Christ that he was lost in his addictive sin, like the wayward son of the Bible (Luke 15), and that he believed that Jesus could help him and give him the ability to turn away from alcohol. He experienced the loving embrace of Jesus Christ that night. Relationship with Christ became real in one whoosh. Hope was realized and faith emerged and began to grow into something real. Dean, then, told God, and also declared it to me, that he committed his life to doing the will of God as really the only way to get right with God, with his wife, and live one day at a time sober.

When I taught Dean the principle of offering his body to God as a living sacrifice by the function and activity of his life in support of his recovery, he clearly understood. Remember, Dean does not come from a “churched-up” background. He is not someone that prayed or believed much more about God than maybe what he imagined God to be. When I talked to him about God wanting to transform his entire character into something new by the renewing of his mind, Dean grinned wide and said emphatically, “God’s already doing that.” He went on to say he thinks differently and that he “feels it.”

Dean was walking on water. When talking about how his priorities have changed, Dean talked about his relationship with God as his top priority. When talking about the benefits of a lifestyle of recovery, Dean talked about having the “love of God” in his life as the most meaningful benefit. One doesn’t typically talk about the love of God unless he has experienced the love of God changing his life.

I told Dean that with our commitment and faithfulness to working a disciplined program of recovery, according to the ABC model of transformative recovery demonstrated by Jesus himself, he would not only get well but experience the abundant blessing promised to anyone committed to living out the will of God. Dean now has the upper hand in winning the battle for his mind.

Trusting God in the details

Dean totally believed me and believed the Word of God because of the resurrection from the death in his own life he was already experiencing. Dean told me a testimony of God doing something special to affirm his faith. Dean’s is a team leader at his current position where he leads a team that maintains production machinery in a plant outside of Chicago. On a Saturday, a member of his team was working to repair a machine and having quite a bit of difficulty. It was hot in the plant (over 100 degrees), working Saturday was overtime, and nerves were getting frayed the longer it took, and the more complicated the repair seemed to become as Dean and this team member worked together to repair this machine. The longer it took to fix the thing the more behind they were in production. When it felt like the day was getting away from them going on 1:00 in the afternoon, Dean and the other guy were really at a loss for what to do. They tried everything they knew and nothing worked.

Dean thought to pray. He even thought of his ABCs of recovery and admitted to God that his way of handling the situation was not working. He felt powerless and told God that he believed that he could help somehow. He then committed to trusting God. It might have seemed to be a bit of a stretch to expect divine intervention for a machine, but… Then, just before 1:00, only minutes after Dean prayed for God’s help, the phone rang. It was an engineer who works for the company calling Dean just to ask how he was doing. The guy was calling from Ohio on a Saturday when Dean is rarely working at the plant, which seems a bit unusual to me. Dean told this engineer he was doing alright but that he was really having difficulty with a machine, and proceeded to explain the problem. The man on the phone made a few suggestions on what to do with the machine and in less than ten minutes after following the instructions of the engineer, they completed the repair and the machine worked wonderfully. Dean thanked the engineer, and then thanked God, who he believes directed this man to call him on Saturday.

Dean has admitted to me over the past year that he has had occasion to slip in his journey of recovery from alcohol addiction. Even Peter, while walking with Jesus, had occasion to slip and sink like a rock, but then he cried out again, “Jesus save me (again).” And Jesus took his hand, back up to where he is, to continue walking on water, doing the impossible by the power given by Christ.

The difference these days for Dean is that slipping back into addictive behaviors is a deft reminder that he is only as strong as his relationship with God. Dean now recognizes that falling does not have to mean failure. Rather than succumb to the death grip of shame, which could drag him back into that addictive lifestyle, Dean resumes the discipline of recovery, beginning and continuing in prayer. The transforming power of a renewed mind has empowered Dean to get up and do the right thing when he gets knocked down from time to time. He does not experience the “whoosh” like he did that first time he encountered God but he doesn’t need that anymore. Now he knows what the evidence of the unseen looks like. Each time he goes his own way and sinks, like Peter, Dean understands that it is when he extends his hand to Jesus, again and again, that he resumes walking on the water that is recovery.

Dean, who had not seen his daughter for more than two years, has been restored into relationship with her. This is one dividend of his recovery. What a blessing it is to see recovery pay off in a manner as blessed as the reunion between a father and his daughter. God is paying attention to the details in our lives and is in the business of reconciliation and recovery.

Keep in mind that these stories are not about the miracles. This stuff is kids’ stuff to God. These stories are about a Savior who keeps after his followers; a Shepherd who looks after his sheep; a Father who dotes on his children. The amazing thing about Almighty God is that he chooses out of love to have a relationship with us. All you need to remember is that it’s not about the “wow!” of the miracle; it’s about the passion within the relationship. God is passionately in love and involved with us.

God is indeed awesome!

Dean’s face lit up big time when I offered him this Scripture from the book of Ephesians.

“For this reason I bow my knees to God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ…that He would grant you according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man; that Christ may be alive in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in His love, may be able to comprehend with all believers what is the width, depth, length and height—to know the love of Christ which is beyond knowledge; and that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. “Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we could ask or think, according to His power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Jesus Christ to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”Ephesians 3:14, 16-20 (NKJV)

The Recovery Bible (NLT) reads that God will do “what we dare to ask or even hope for.” Other Bible translations say that he will do “more than we could ask or even imagine.” God does desire to bless us beyond our wildest expectation. However, we must be fully surrendered to God to allow his Spirit to dwell, or live, in our inner man, the core of our being and character, to change how we think by the renewing of our mind.

I have had a number of clients over the years that have experienced wonderful blessing as they committed to turning their lives over to the care and will of God. Dean is a client that experienced that kind of incredible blessing in his life as testimony of God’s bountiful grace. He described God’s blessing to a co-worker as three miracles:

1) “I’m not drinking.”

2) “I’m still with my wife after all the pain I’ve brought her.”

3) “I’m reunited with my daughter.”

Dean has said that he can appreciate that as he commits himself to God by how he behaves and submits himself to God from the outside in, he can sense God working in him from the inside out. As he has committed himself to living his recovery God’s way, a transformation has taken place and the overhaul of Dean’s character continues as God continues to radically change his way of thinking from the inside out. In this relationship with Christ is victory in the battleground of the mind. As distorted thought and feelings return from time to time, Dean has discovered that he longer reacts automatically to them. He’s mindful to pray and patient to trust God.

Expanding the battleground

As of this writing, it has been two years since Dean was in my program. I was able to chat with him and talk to him about his more recent journey in recovery. He stated that there have been ups and downs along the way but that God has been faithful. He said, “God still loves us, doesn’t he.”

I shared with him what I had heard from the pulpit from Pastor Leeman about Peter walking on water empowered by God’s authority. Dean agreed; that is what God does, granting Dean the power to do the impossible. Dean said it reminds him of the time not that long ago when he had opportunity to extend his knowledge—that from a renewed mind—with a co-worker who had lost his wallet for a time. Dean asked him, “Did you pray?” He then challenged his co-worker to give prayer a chance. Dean told the man of the time when he had lost his own wallet. He had looked everywhere he could think of and did not find it anywhere. It seemed that finding his wallet would be impossible. That was until Dean prayed. You see, Dean’s mind had completely changed about prayer since Christ transformed his life. Dean prays believing. When Dean prays, he expects God to respond in some way. Dean promptly found his wallet in a place he had not thought to look.

Dean’s co-worker on the other hand did not have the faith to believe. This is how the twelfth of the twelve steps works. The twelfth step is as follows: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others and to practice these principles in all our affairs. Earlier on, Dean had prayed to the “God of Steven”. Now Dean, having confident knowledge of the will of God to recover lost lives, saw an opportunity to help a co-worker discover the faithfulness of Jesus Christ through the recovery of his wallet. The man prayed to the “God of Dean”, and after being without his wallet for weeks, had it returned to him the very next day. Everything was still in it. Even the cash in his wallet was all there. Dean had extended the blessing given him by God to another individual in need of a blessing. The man experienced God. Not merely the God of Dean, but the God who is attentive and involved with everyone. Dean expanded the territory of battle. With the upper hand in the battleground for his own mind is was time to take the fight for freedom beyond himself. Now there is another out there considering the realities of Almighty God. That is how recovery works. God still loves us, doesn’t he?

Measured Faith (Belief Enough?)

Measured Faith Recovery Lesson” href=”http://www.freedomfrommedom.com/member/lessons/twirl-047-measured-faith-belief-enough” target=”_blank”>recovery lesson and application challenge.

Jesus immediately reached out and grabbed him. “You have so little faith,” Jesus said. “Why did you doubt me?” Matthew 14:31 (NLT)

Jesus asked:
“Why do you have so little faith? “So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’” Matthew 6:31 (NLT)

“Measured Faith (Belief Enough?)” is a revealing examination of belief as it is measured by faith from what appears to be very different translations of Romans 12:3. What is behind varying degrees of faith that gets in the way of the surrendered life necessary to reap the full measure of blessing?”

Jesus replied, “Have I been with you all this time… and yet you still don’t know who I am?” John 14:9 (NLT)

The second of the twelve steps declares that we came to believe in a power greater than ourselves who can restore us to… fill in the blank. The third step boldly declares that we have turned our will and life over to the care of God as we understood… or, came to believe in… Him. How is this proven to be true in your life? Why would you not fully surrender all in your life of faith if you fully believe in God’s promised best for you?

The following are two credible translations of the same Scripture. Please consider the loaded questions following the first translation. Then notice how the meaning changes dramatically from the first translation of the Scripture to the second. 

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith. Romans 12:2-3 (NKJV)

For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. Romans 12:3 (NIV)

Ask yourself the following questions:

• What does it really mean to say that I came to believe in a power greater than myself; or that I came to believe in God; or that I have faith in God?
• How much faith do I have in God?
• What does it mean to have received from God a measure of faith?
• How much do I believe?
• Do I fully believe? Am I confident in my faith?
• What does it really mean that I have surrendered my life to the will and plan of God?
• Am I really committed… entirely committed… to pleasing and serving God?
• What does that look like? What does that sound like? What does that feel like?
• What am I doing today that reflects my belief… faith… surrender… commitment… to pleasing and serving God because I believe fully and entirely, with a full measure of faith, in God’s will and plan for my life?
• What am I thinking and imagining that reflects the truth of my belief, faith, surrender, and commitment? Or does my behavior and imagination express and expose who I am, what I am, and where I am when it comes to the truth that lies in these questions?

I am very uncomfortable personally with these questions; not in asking them of you the reader, but in responding to them from an honest place in my own heart, mind, and soul.

Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. Because of the privilege and authority God has given me, I give each of you this warning: Don’t think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us. Romans 12:2-3 (NLT)

As your spiritual teacher I give this piece of advice to each one of you. Don’t cherish exaggerated ideas of yourself or your importance, but try to have a sane estimate of your capabilities by the light of the faith that God has given to you all. Romans 12:3 (Phillips New Testament)

When I examine the New Living Translation (NLT) and Phillips New Testament of the same passage from Romans it appears to read quite differently than the New King James Version (NKJV) and the New International Version (NIV).

I have an uncomfortable feeling that Phillips and NLT might have it right. Why would God give to me less faith than He would give you; or you less faith than He would “distribute” to me? Does that even make sense? While we are gifted uniquely, have been called to serve uniquely, and have experienced varying degrees of revelation into deeper knowledge perhaps, it does not make much sense to me that impartial God would dole out varying measures of faith as it pertains to fundamental revelation and access, through relationship with Jesus Christ, to Almighty God.

What does make sense is that as God imparts to me faith by revelation of Himself to my mind, my heart, and my soul, that I would by my choice decide how to invest myself into the full abundant life God has chosen to bless me with. What does make sense is that I choose the degree to which I want to surrender my life and intentions over to the plan God has revealed to me about the new life He wants and has for me to experience.

Should I sow the seed of new life into everything I am and do, I will reap a harvest of blessing. Should I sow the seed of new life sparingly or with some reservation, holding back some, I will reap sparingly or with at least some degree of reservation the blessing that God wants to lavish on me without reservation, sparing nothing (God has chosen to afford me the choice the extent to which I am receptive to the immeasurably lavish blessing He intends to rain on me).

Expectations about Faith

If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind. Such people should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Their loyalty is divided between God and the world, and they are unstable in everything they do. James 1:5-8 (NLT)

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do. James 1:5-8 (NIV)

I believe that James is writing that God does not find fault with my emotionally-driven fear and anxiety when I come seeking from Him everything from wisdom to a miracle. Because should I doubt God’s ability to engage, work, and move in my circumstances due to an intellectual conclusion of disbelief that God is God, and I turn to alternative remedies to manage fear and anxiety, then I am wavering in the gusty winds of divided loyalty. It is then I am double-minded and unstable in pursuit of resolution. It is then that I am lost like sheep without a shepherd. While James writes then that I ought not to expect to receive anything from the Lord it doesn’t mean that I won’t receive from Him. James is speaking about my state of mind. He is saying that I will have lowered my expectations of what God can and will do.

If I have concluded that I probably will not receive much of anything from God, why would I expect to receive much of anything from God? There really won’t be any relief from pain, fear, and worry should I altogether not believe in what God can do. It’s common sense at that point. I’m an emotional mess from the empty conclusions I have drawn intellectually about what God can and will do. Absent is the hopeful anticipation of God’s intervention that would have a calming effect on my nerves.

Thank God I believe intellectually and spiritually in what God can do. Too often, though, I question my faith because I doubt on an emotional level. I need to stop the practice of riding my feelings until I feel guilty that I doubt God. I feel guilty doubting God because of what I know and believe intellectually (in relationship with Christ) God can do; I struggle emotionally with what I believe God will do. Is he willing? Is there something wrong with me? I think that’s what it means to have faith in the midst of doubt because of the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen (Hebrews 11:1). What I feel isn’t necessarily a reflection of what I know. What I doubt emotionally isn’t necessarily a reflection of what I know intellectually and believe spiritually in my soul.

The question that is most discomforting to me is not, “How much do I believe?” or “How much faith do I have?” The question is not even, “Do I believe?” Because I do. The question is, “Will I let go of what I want, and choose to receive what God wants and has for me?”

As you read this, the first question for you might be, “Do you believe?” And if you do, you are in the same boat I am. Are you willing? Will you let go of what you want, and choose what God wants and has for you? Don’t be so quick to answer. If your answer is yes then your life should reflect your answer through and through. How confident are you when you pray? What is the level or degree of your faith?

If I am being honest, I have substantially more confidence that God will bless you in the miraculous than I believe He will bless me. Not because I don’t believe God can bless me that way. But because I am in a hurry according to my standards and according to what I suppose I believe I deserve. I think my problem with belief and faith has a great deal to do with my sense of entitlement. I deserve what I want and believe that I need as soon as possible.

When I began FREEdom from MEdom Project, I had the expectation that the world desperately needed what God is saying through me about how to sustain long term recovery God’s way. It my dream to take the counseling and writing ability God has blessed me with, along with the vision He has laid upon my heart, to do FREEdom from MEdom full time. Things need to occur for that to happen. I believe God has given me a promise for this ministry. Initially the idea was to sell memberships incredibly inexpensively. Then someone mentoring me said, “What about those who still cannot afford it, or will miss out because they will not pay for something on the free internet?” I agreed and made it possible to donate without charging for these services. Donations are pouring in at approximately… are you ready… six dollars per year. I thought I would be discovered and published. I thought I would be teaching at conferences. Am I not entitled to more success? What, only the Joel Osteens, T.D. Jakes, and Rick Warrens of the world get to do this? Come on, God… I want in!

However, since I have been working at the prison I have had tremendous opportunity to share the good news of a new life experience God’s way in relationship with Jesus Christ to so many men whose lives would ultimately end in prison (or they would get out and die on the streets) without such liberating truth. Thousands and thousands of people around the world are reading this message and invitation to experience new life set free from addiction to what holds them captive.

I wonder if the question of how much faith I have is somehow tied in to what I feel entitled to, meaning what I believe I deserve. Abraham and Sarah may have dealt with some of this when they waited twenty years for the promise of a son by God and… nothing. How often might you think Abraham and Sarah made beautiful love together in the hope that they were making together the promised son? It appears as though they gave in to their sense of entitlement and strategized to find an alternative to God’s plan. Abraham conveniently married Hagar and she was pregnant without another thought. Born was Ishmael and the rest is history. Abraham and Sarah felt apparently that they deserved a son.

The writer of Hebrews writes of Abraham’s unwavering faith but it appears to have wavered when it came to waiting on God’s promise of the son that was Isaac. Did Abraham lack faith? I don’t think so.  I think he and his wife grew impatient and sought desperate measures for an alternative to waiting on the fulfillment of God’s plan. Perhaps the thinking was that even God declared they were entitled to a son as long as it was promised to them. So Abraham did what he had to do to get what he deserved.

So What Then about Faith?

Is my belief system skewed by what I believe I deserve? Do my expectations shape my “beliefs” when it comes to the matter of faith? If God determines that how He chooses to bless me is affected by what I believe I deserve, is it because God recognizes that my so-called faith is actually shaped by what I desire in my flesh, which is selfish and feels entitled?

This becomes especially fragile and sensitive for me. I thought I would be published by now and making a living writing, and perhaps even counseling, from my computer. I hoped I would be doing well enough with FREEdom from MEdom ministries that I would be doing it full-time. And if I am entirely honest, I suppose I hoped some recognition would have come my way by now… well, you know… because this FREEdom from MEdom stuff is SO good… profound truth from a fountain of knowledge and wisdom and all that.

What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? ² You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. ³ When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.

⁴ You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God? Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. ⁵ Or do you think Scripture says without reason that he jealously longs for the spirit he has caused to dwell in us? ⁶ But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud  but shows favor to the humble.”

⁷ Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. ⁸ Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.⁹ Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. ¹⁰ Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. James 4:1-10 (NIV)

Things have not worked out according to my expectations. Does that mean that God hasn’t blessed this ministry? Honestly? Not in the way I want Him to. Instead, there are dozens, if not hundreds, of men who have been blessed and perhaps even saved by the truth, knowledge, and wisdom delivered through these FREEdom from MEdom/NewLIFE Xperience principles. Thousands of people around the world have read from this online ministry. Dozens, hundreds, maybe thousands more have been influenced by those touched by God through this ministry. Only God knows.

God also knows me well enough to know what He can and cannot trust me with. My pride, my lazy prayer life, my undisciplined habits and routines may in fact limit my access and effectiveness because God knows that I will certainly fall otherwise. So the reasonable question is, if I recognize things in me and my intentions, motivations, and lifestyle routines, why don’t I commit to change respectful to the calling on my life? What a great question! What a challenging question? Do you relate to it?

Faith in the flesh… what a concept. While it is an obvious contradiction, perhaps it is as much a paradox. James writes in chapter four that my problem with what appears to be the absence of blessing is the absence of my desires and motivations lining up with what God wants and has for me. The tragedy in that is that what God wants and has for me is His very best.

Desiring God’s Best

Take delight in the Lord,  and he will give you your heart’s desires. Psalm 37:4 (NLT)

Often times this passage in Psalm 37 is taken grossly out of context. Even when it’s interpreted that if I am walking in the will of God He will bless the desire of my heart, it is misleading. My heart is still selfish, particularly when the heat is turned up. When I am transformed by the renewing of my mind (Romans 12:2), taken in proper context, God has rearranged my thinking to want and be willing to receive what He wants and has for me. In other words, He has transformed my wants by putting His desires and motivations deep within me, giving me my heart’s desires – His desires.

But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Matthew 6:33 (NKJV)

When I am motivated to seek first God’s best through the righteousness of Jesus Christ, God is more than happy and willing to add to my life the experience of His best. His best for my life will be a blessing to anyone who is touched by my life.

J.B. Phillips in his translation perhaps says it best.

Set your heart on the kingdom and his goodness, and all these things will come to you as a matter of course.  Matthew 6:33 (Phillips New Testament)

This is an incredible promise of blessing that brings this next passage to life.

Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. Ephesians 3:20 (NLT)… or as J.B. Phillips translates … dare to ask or imagine.

Okay, now we’re getting carried away. It all sounds good, but come on.

What’s the problem here?

The problem is that God’s best is too good to be true to be experienced in this life on this side of eternity. Just allow me to relax and do whatever it is that I do. Don’t put too much on my plate. I need my television time. I need my down time… my alone time to unwind and decompress. I need my sleep. I’m not being sarcastic, this is how I think. I want to be lazy, disrespectful of the call of God to really dig in to what He wants and has for me to pierce and feed my soul. I want God’s best so long as I can do my thing my own way in my own time.

⁴ Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again—rejoice! ⁵ Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the Lord is coming soon.

⁶ Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. ⁷ Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

⁸ And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. ⁹ Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.

¹⁰ How I praise the Lord that you are concerned about me again. I know you have always been concerned for me, but you didn’t have the chance to help me. ¹¹ Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. ¹² I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. ¹³ For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. Philippians 4:4-13 (NLT)

Really… is this poetic hyperbole? No. This is the real deal! I don’t have to like it but here’s the thing. If I really knew and understood what I was missing, missing out on God’s best, I would drop every shallow and dissatisfying routine that sabotages what I can enjoy in the joy of the Lord, so that I could experience life in the best of what God wants and has for me.

Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory he will reveal to us later. Romans 8:18 (NLT)

Already Free in the Joy

If you haven’t yet, I’d like to encourage you to read My Problem with Hank… Prisoner Set Free.  This is written about a prisoner that I work with who has been set free from the chains of addiction and bondage to life’s “stuff” in a way that convicts me to the core of my selfish existence. He is a brother in Christ who is free in a sense that I have never known, full of joy in the Lord. I get near him and feel like whatever he has, I want some of that. And he has quite a bit of prison time left to serve yet he is so free.

You might say, “Well look at his circumstances, he needs Jesus more.” And what really is the point of this whole thing is that he doesn’t need Jesus any less than you or I do. You might say he has less weighing him down. He doesn’t have a big screen television. He doesn’t have financial responsibilities. He doesn’t have to deal with the stresses of the job every day. He doesn’t have to take care of his family… at least he can’t from prison.

Hank lives in what is essentially a bathroom with another man. Hank has a godly wife who is waiting sacrificially for him. He has post-adolescent children living the life of the streets, following in daddy’s footsteps. Hank has a home and financial responsibility. Hank does not know from one day to the next how his family will make it and he is powerless from prison to do anything substantial to help anyone out there. But somehow, living out Philippians 4 and James 1, being transformed by the renewing of his mind, Hank has been set free.

²² A mob quickly formed against Paul and Silas, and the city officials ordered them stripped and beaten with wooden rods. ²³ They were severely beaten, and then they were thrown into prison. The jailer was ordered to make sure they didn’t escape. ²⁴ So the jailer put them into the inner dungeon and clamped their feet in the stocks.

²⁵ Around midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening. ²⁶ Suddenly, there was a massive earthquake, and the prison was shaken to its foundations. All the doors immediately flew open, and the chains of every prisoner fell off! ²⁷ The jailer woke up to see the prison doors wide open. He assumed the prisoners had escaped, so he drew his sword to kill himself. ²⁸ But Paul shouted to him, “Stop! Don’t kill yourself! We are all here!”

²⁹ The jailer called for lights and ran to the dungeon and fell down trembling before Paul and Silas.³⁰ Then he brought them out and asked, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?”

³¹ They replied, “Believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved, along with everyone in your household.” ³² And they shared the word of the Lord with him and with all who lived in his household.³³ Even at that hour of the night, the jailer cared for them and washed their wounds. Then he and everyone in his household were immediately baptized. ³⁴ He brought them into his house and set a meal before them, and he and his entire household rejoiced because they all believed in God.

³⁵ The next morning the city officials sent the police to tell the jailer, “Let those men go!” ³⁶ So the jailer told Paul, “The city officials have said you and Silas are free to leave. Go in peace.” Acts 16:22-36 (NLT)

What is necessary to understand about this passage is that Paul and Silas were so filled with joy in the best of what God wants and has for them that even when the chains fell off all of the prisoners, no one left the dungeon. They had already been set free from the chains of this life. None of the other prisoners left either. They wanted some of what Paul and Silas had. The jailer didn’t run either in fear for his life when Paul said to him, “Look, we’re all still here…” even though the quake had loosed their chains and jarred all of the doors open. The jailer stuck around as well. He wanted some of what Paul and Silas had. The city officials were moved to then let them all go free. Like Paul and Silas, Hank is filled with joy and already free! I want some of what he’s got whenever I am around him.

Are you still with me?

“Why call Me Lord when you don’t mean it?”

Honestly… What keeps you chained in your recovery journey and Christ-centered life from fully receiving the miracle of the best of the new life experience that God wants and has for you? I was honest about myself earlier in this article. Now it is time for you to be honest with yourself. For me, the matter is full surrender to God’s calling on my life for every hour of every day. If that sounds like a bit much for you, it’s a bit much for me too. But truth is truth.

I haven’t even brought up yet the issue of sin… you know… declaring to God that you love Him but then at times living as though He doesn’t exist; also true of me. Maybe it’s entertaining lusts of the eyes and imagination. Maybe it’s coveting material prosperity. Maybe it’s harboring resentment and jealousy. Maybe it’s living in shame, or loneliness, or living in fear. Maybe it’s being overrun by anxiety and stress. Maybe it’s being selfish with your money. Maybe it’s being selfish with your time; even if you’re always too busy. Maybe it’s holding on to your obsessions and addictions. You likely know even though it might always be clear to you, and certainly God knows.

“So why do you keep calling me ‘Lord, Lord!’ when you don’t do what I say?  Luke 6:46

The word ‘lord’ is a word of authority. The name Lord for Christ is a name of trusted authority. I call Jesus Lord all the time. So why don’t I believe and respect, even revere, His lordship all of the time? How is it that I can call Him Lord and then live as though I do not trust in, respect, and certainly revere, His authority, ability, desire, and willingness to bless me to the full with abundant life as promised in John 10:10? Why do I not fully believe in the promise of Ephesians 3:20 that God can and will do infinitely more in my life that I even dare to ask or imagine?

How about you?

If you appear to live like you have measured faith it is because you are divided between what you want and aspire to in the flesh and what you want and aspire to in relationship with Christ. In relationship with Jesus, you are transformed into new life by the renewing of your mind. Paul writes that you in fact live this transformed life having the mind of Christ having received God’s best.    

We have received God’s Spirit (not the world’s spirit), so we can know the wonderful things God has freely given us… We understand these things, for we have the mind of Christ. 1 Corinthians 2:12, 16b (NLT)

I could go on with promise after promise. The issue is, if you are limited to a measure of faith it is because you are divided and unstable in who and what you are in relationship with God. You are divided between the new you in Christ that you see when you look into the mirror and the old you that you remember and cling to when you walk away from it; me too.

What a life it would be

Why it that we struggle so to believe all of it? As long as we hold on to the former life in the flesh by choice, we choose to forfeit so much of God’s best; not only for us, but for our families, loved ones, friends, and so on. That’s right. When we surrender all into the full blessing of abundant life, those we touch in some way are also touched by the blessing. When we choose limited blessing because of divided loyalty limiting faith – confidence – in what we say we believe in, we can limit the blessing to those under our influence.

I’ll put this back onto I-statements. I need to do what the Word of God says and what I know spiritually and intellectually to be true and reasonably sensible for my life; because it is good and right and it is God’s best. Even something as small as a mustard seed that fully believes can move a mountain and experience the full blessing of abundant life. So why measured faith? From revelation of truth comes belief. From belief in truth comes faith. From faith—confidence in what you believe—comes surrender. From surrender comes obedience. Why not let go into total surrender if I believe in the truth of the Word of God? Do I believe enough that I am confident in the promises and assurances in the Bible? Or, is what I believe clouded by entitlement (sin)?

Do you believe enough? Is your faith measured according to what you believe you deserve?

For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him. Philippians 2:13 (NLT)

Please, let’s pray for each to let go and surrender to the truthful teachings and promises of God’s Word and enter in to the fullness of everything that is God’s best for us. Then He is able to freely work His purpose through us without fighting us like a parent trying to get his child to accept and appreciate something amazing, if the child only believed enough; not only in the creation but in the Creator; not in the gift but in the giver of the gift. What a life it would be.

Click on Measured Faith Recovery Lesson.

Trapped in a House on Fire!

It’s been said that the first of the twelve steps is a step of surrender… to admit that I am powerless over my addiction and that my life is unmanageable. This may be true, but the whole truth is that surrender can go one way or the other. I might admit that I am powerless over my addiction but then still surrender to my addiction when there isn’t a viable higher power. My addiction is a power greater than myself. I can’t change it; I can’t stop it; and if I can’t beat it, I might as well join it and surrender to the ritualistic power that my addiction has over me. OR, I can come into a connection with a power greater than myself; and more powerful than my addiction.

The Prodigal Son that Jesus talked about had to make that call when it finally dawned on him that he was going to starve to death if he continued down the path of destruction he was on. Coming to his senses meant that he realized what was at stake in his addiction. He could have chosen to remain in it and, like it or not, live with what may have come with the temporary gratifications in his mess of a life.

I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. I want to do what is right, but I can’t. I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway. But if I do what I don’t want to do, I am not really the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it. I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. I love God’s law with all my heart. But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? Romans 7:18-24 (NLT)

What does it really mean to admit that I am truly powerless?

I am trapped in a house on fire… thick flames and smoke is all around me… everything is on fire. I admit I am powerless to the fire, but there is nowhere to go. I am on the floor breathing my last breaths as smoke and flames are overtaking me. But then suddenly it happens. Someone is lifting me to my feet. It’s the fireman. He is fully equipped to not get burned. He wraps me in his coat, puts an oxygen mask over my face and says, “Let’s go… come with me!” There is no doubt in my mind that I am not better off without the fireman. I believe, or at least hope enough, that the fireman can and will rescue me if I give up my position from where I am and go with him. (Step 2 suggests that I have come to believe in a power greater than myself who can restore me to sanity… to right living.) I suppose I could look back or try to hold on to some things in the house; maybe grab onto some things I can carry with me while being rescued. Some things are just hard to let go of.

Then the fireman says, “Let go… that’s too much weight… and besides, it’s all on fire!” I decide that the fireman is right and I let it go and do what he says for me to do, and go where he says for me to go. (Step 3 suggests that I have decided to turn my will and life over to the care of God, or in this case the fireman, as I understood him, or have come to believe in him and what he is equipped to do for me.)

Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death. Romans 7:24-25, 8:1-2 (NLT)

You see, the house is my life and the fire is my addiction. The fireman is my higher power that saved me from my addiction. I look back at my life and it’s smoldering. It’s in ruins. I look back at the fireman and he is dressed like a doctor. The doctor helps me to heal. I look at myself and see that I am much better. I look back at him and he is dressed like a construction worker. He is wearing a tool belt and hard hat. He also has a tool belt and hard hat for me, and says to me lovingly, “Let’s go… we have work to do.” He is committed with me to do the work to rebuild my life until it is working better than ever (steps 4-12).

Every day, as I surrender to my higher power in recovery, compelled by loving kindness, my Higher Power is committed to me and the work of rebuilding the house that is my life… it was a cottage; but I have seen the blue print… my life’s not a cottage according to these plans… it’s a castle. From inside this castle, I look to my Higher Power, and listen to him. He is a father to me; he is my brother; and and he is my friend.

But because I still have a tendency to start fires that affect my life and those living in the house that is my life… you know, because I am still selfish… my Higher Power comes in like a fireman whenever I call for help. I need not use the phone, though, to contact Him. You see, He lives in my house. So He is always there; always available; always accessible. He is still the doctor that heals my wounds since I tend to carelessly walk right into the fire. I can be ignorant like that; so caught up in my indulgences that I pay no mind to the fires. After putting out fires and patching up my wounds, He does the patchwork around my life when its beyond me to repair things. Otherwise, He provides me with the ability and will to do some self-repair. And most valuable is that He is faithful; faithful to equip and help me, heal me, and remake me.

It’s often said that the third step is the hardest of the twelve steps. The illustration of the fireman as the rescuer from a life on fire suggests that the third step is the easiest of the steps. What is so difficult is that I see fires burning all over the house but don’t act to put them out until the fires become one massive fire raging out of control and I am powerless and desperately in need of help. When the help comes in my desperation, surrender makes the most sense; you might say that surrender comes easy as if I have no other choice. The issue is that I might not realize my need until it’s too late and I am consumed by the fire.

Don’t ever wait too long to call on the fireman. Call on him, today.

Open Sesame…The Way Out is the Way In

Why don’t we trust God? Is it because we struggle to entirely believe? Hebrews 11:1 says, “Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen.” Faith comes from hope being realized in substance according to the evidence. We don’t see gravity but we experience gravity all the time. We know the truth about gravity and come to trust it even though we do not see it. It could be said that we have a relationship with gravity. Our lives are touched by gravity everyday.

The truth is that freedom is achieved through a revolutionary event. ‘Revolutionary’ means a sudden, radical, or complete change; a fundamental change in the way of thinking about or visualizing something; a change in paradigm (belief, world view), meaning your standard for living. A sudden revelation of faith having encountered the Savior, Jesus Christ, will speak life into how you experience revolutionary transformative recovery in how you live everyday—a new standard of thinking and living, with healthy hopeful expectations. It is in relationship with Jesus that you will come to know God to be real and living. It is in relationship with Christ that you enter into the new age of grace that will usher you into the experience of new life.

After Jesus spoke to a crowd about what it was to really be in relationship with him, they struggled to understand. He had just fed thousands of these people with two fish and five loves of bread with a bunch of leftovers. The people were impressed, amazed, and satisfied that Jesus was the prophet sent by God to lift them from their oppression to the evil Roman Empire ruining their very existence.

When the people saw him do this miraculous sign, they exclaimed, “Surely, he is the Prophet we have been expecting!” John 6:14 (NLT)

Many from the crowd followed the twelve disciples a great distance in boats across a raucous sea to get more of, and from, Jesus. They hoped to force his hand and make him their king. They were not entirely interested in having a relationship with Jesus, but wanted a better life than the one they had, and he was their “meal” ticket—not much different from the way it is today. They asked, “How do we achieve God’s work in our life? What should we do?”

Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, you want to be with me because I fed you, not because you understood the miraculous signs. But don’t be so concerned about perishable things like food. Spend your energy seeking the eternal life that the Son of Man can give you. For God the Father has given me the seal of his approval.” Jesus told them, “This is the only work God wants from you: Believe in the one he has sent.” John 6:26-27, 29 (NLT)

Jesus went on to talk about how he is the true bread, and to come into real relationship with him is like eating his flesh and drinking his blood as to inhabit or dwell in fellowship with him. This was a difficult teaching to conceptualize and understand. They were not ready for that kind of commitment in relationship with Jesus. He was sounding a bit out there. After all, they knew his parents and siblings. Now he’s talking about eating his flesh like eating bread in a desperate state of hunger, and drinking his blood as if it were water quenching a great thirst.

Pastor Fran Leeman (LifeSpring Community Church, Plainfield, IL) preached on this and my eyes were opened to the vast contrast between who Jesus is and what we often perceive him to be. We might blame religious doctrines and traditions for jaded perceptions about the person of Jesus Christ. Besides the twelve, there were dozens, perhaps hundreds of disciples (followers), who had followed Jesus to Capernaum.

Jesus said to them,

“I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry again. Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty. But you haven’t believed in me even though you have seen me. I tell you the truth, anyone who believes has eternal life. Yes, I am the bread of life!” John 6:35-36, 47-48 (NLT)

But then…

Many of his disciples said, “This is very hard to understand. How can anyone accept it?” John 6:60 (NLT)

Jesus was aware that many of these followers did not recognize that he represented the authority of God, who they thought they knew. How could Jesus be bread sent down from heaven? They complained and argued amongst themselves against this teaching. One minute, these so-called “believers” were ready to literally cross the deepest sea and climb the highest mountain to obtain the freedom they so desperately sought from their oppressor by way of their new king, Jesus. The next minute, they were so full of doubt that they were ready to walk away from freedom. And many of them did just that. (Even though they had no other choice, someone telling them they needed to say “open sesame” in order to experience freedom in life was nuts and they were not about to follow that kind of leader.)

At this point many of his disciples turned away and deserted him. John 6:66 (NLT)

Jesus was weeding out those who want what he really wants and has for them—relationship with the giver, from those only coming to the party for food and gifts.

Then Jesus turned to the Twelve and asked, “Are you also going to leave?” John 6:67 (NLT)

What about you? Recovery can be a rough road at times. Life is hard. What if you run into something that is difficult to understand? Why would God allow this or that to happen in my life? Even though Christ has delivered you from your oppressor, addictive self-centered obsession and sin, something happens that evokes doubt and has you asking questions. Will you give up on Jesus and turn away?

I shared this complex teaching with a client, Collin, who came in to our recovery program motivated by legal issues for a third DUI aggravated by the fact that he received it while driving with a revoked driver’s license. He was 65 hours into a 75-hour outpatient program that took a few months to complete. He did not believe in God at the outset of his therapy. He had never really prayed before in his life. He was a man with money. Collin had run a company with his father until his father died of cancer and he sold his share of the company. He was a good-looking single gentleman in his early 40s and in a stable relationship with his girlfriend. Collin was what you might call a self-made man. But he had this debilitating legal cloud hanging over his head. If convicted of his crime he would see prison time, up to three years.

Collin, who had had it all once and is still doing pretty well for himself, told me that he felt something was missing. He had attended church weddings and saw people engaging in religious activities that seemed to have meaning to them. He told me that our recovery program, unapologetically Christ-centered and Biblically based, could profit him beyond the obvious legal benefit. While my client did not believe in God or Jesus Christ, he was not at all opposed to the idea of faith in God. But still, believing in the practical reality of Jesus alive was comparable to believing that Santa Clause is real, alive and the one who can save him.

I encouraged Collin from the beginning to pray out loud when he had privacy. He’d feel like he was talking to himself for awhile but became increasingly comfortable as he would quietly talk to God while he went for walks. He had heard enough people in his therapy groups who he’d come to know and trust tell him that prayer works, and who sounded believable, he give this prayer thing a try. In time he could sense that God might be listening though it was by no way a sure thing. Then he encountered a situation that he had no control over and he spent time praying about it. Things seemed to work out and my client agreed that it was likely God working in the situation that got resolved. He would thank God and talk to him with a much stronger sense that Jesus not a fable of imagination but is indeed real, listening, and involved.

Then Collin arrived at his court date for the aggravated DUI. He prayed the night before as he walked. He understood that he was guilty of self-centered addictive behavior, that he and others could have been severely affected by his actions, and that God did not owe him anything. While his lawyer and the prosecutor were in a room at the courthouse discussing his case with the judge, Collin prayed. He could get three years and would likely get at least a third to half of that time in prison. He would certainly go away for awhile. Would his girlfriend and her two-year-old daughter—who he loves very much—wait for him?

His lawyer came out from the room. His lawyer gave my client the thumbs up as he approached him. Maybe he would get less than a year. What did that mean? The next morning I received a message on my cell phone. It was Collin asking emphatically that I call him back, which I promptly did. He didn’t even say hello. “I got probation!” Wow! I had told him stories of others I have counseled that have experienced God quite dramatically in dire circumstances. Now he experienced the compassionate mercy of Jesus Christ in his real-life crisis. Considering the mandatory prison time he was supposed to receive according to Illinois law, it’s as though Collin was pardoned by this judge. This time, it wasn’t merely a sense that God was involved. This time he knew it. It was evident and substantial. The God of the universe who does not owe Collin anything, was compassionate and merciful—real, engaged, and active in Collin’s life.

Like I was saying, I explained to him this difficult teaching about Jesus as the true bread of life—eternal life—sent from heaven. He would agree that eating Christ’s body and drinking his blood is hard to understand. He liked the analogy that Jesus used about the vine and branches (John 15:1-8) much better. I read the question Jesus asked the twelve core disciples after a bunch of avid followers turned and walked away bewildered: “Are you also going to leave?” I asked Collin how he thought they responded. He answered, “Where else are they gonna go?” I was stunned for a moment. That was an insightful thing to say for someone so new to faith. Then I told him how the disciples responded, as Peter spoke for them.

Simon Peter replied, “Lord, to whom would we go? You have the words that give eternal life. We believe, and we know you are the Holy One of God.” John 6:68 (NLT)

Collin said that that is how he felt in court. There was only one who could rescue him from what was surely to be his fate. He might not have been under government oppression like the Jews were at the time of Christ but prison would have changed all that. There isn’t much in life more oppressive than prison. Collin said “open sesame” (metaphorically speaking) and Jesus Christ removed his barrier to freedom making his way for escape. It is Jesus that has the words of life. Where else are you gonna go?

Remember that faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen (Hebrews 11:1). Substance and evidence is knowledge and assurance. When you are in relationship with Jesus Christ to the extent that you hunger and thirst for him, you will know him. It will initiate a revolutionary event in your life and spirit that turns you toward Jesus, especially in the presence of your doubt. And when you have doubt in the presence of serious, even grave circumstances, you can believe with assurance in him because you know him. Jesus Christ is God with all authority. He is the Holy One of God, set apart from the imperfections and limitations that exist in this temporal world we live in. Trust in who you know. Hunger and thirst for the life he wants for you. He can and will give to you all that is his if you’ll let go of your ill-conceived notion of control and give yourself to Jesus.

But we who live by the Spirit eagerly wait to receive by faith the righteousness God has promised to us. Galatians 5:5 (NLT)

When you believe— body, mind, heart, and soul—that God is in control and has it all at his disposal, and that everything he has is yours if you want it (that’s what he said), then committing to live in relationship with Christ is actually quite simple. It is what makes the most sense. Then, you have committed to living in the authority of the one you came to believe.

What other choice do you have, really?

What do you believe… really believe… about God, today? Be sure!

“I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!” Mark 9:24